You're Not Losing A Limb!

You know, it's funny. Throughout literature, and history, women have been labelled "the weaker sex". Obviously, this was in the days before the vasectomy...

In my life of a teeny bit over 3 decades, I have come to know pain on a too intimate basis. I've had 3 endoscopies (not fun!), given birth three times, had three epidurals (also no walk in the park) and a total of 32 stitches in a rather delicate area. I have had a miscarriage and a D &C. I have had my gall bladder removed. And most painful of all...a tattoo on my pelvic region. So, I can say with all confidence that I am familiary with pain in general. I have accepted these pain-causing events with an "that's life for ya" type attitude, and didn't bitch all that much.

My husband, on the other hand, has recently had to come to grips with the reality that a vasectomy is in his immediate future. He doesn't deal. He is of the see no evil, hear no evil variety of man, who, coincidentally, seems to equate a vasectomy with castration. For God's sake! It's a tiny incision , with a local, and is over in 10 minutes. You're not losing a freaking limb!

Am I the only one who has a hubby of the big baby variety when it comes to pain, potential pain, or illness? Somehow, I doubt it...let me know!

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Onto other matters, Keegs started his summer program this week. He seems to really enjoy it. It is 2 hours a day, three days a week. I watch from an observation room, which is equipped with one way glass, and a sound system. It's almost like being part of a cop drama. The best part is when the kids come up to the "mirror" and stare. It's creepy, because you know they can't see you, but it's like they have a sixth sense or something and they invariably make eye contact. Or just stand in front of you with their index finger up their nose to prod at their frontal lobe.

There are 6 kids in total in the program with 2-4 teachers on each day. Some are E.A.'s and the others are therapists in the areas of speech, behaviour, and occupational. They have a very rigid schedule, which these kids thrive on, and it's amazing how after only 3 days, these kids have it down pat. They know when to check their schedules, they know when play times, circle times, and snack times are. They sing all the songs and do the actions. It's neat. Kinda like watching brain-washing first hand, but instead of making you a cold-blooded assassin, they turn you into a human with normal speech and behaviour patterns! A person who will obey a request, and say please and thank you without prompting. A person who will share a toy, and comfort a friend. They should have these sessions for adults in every workplace. The world would be a much nicer place.

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Do you have a vice? Drinking? Smoking? Gambling? Me too.

E-Bay. E for EVIL. Bastards. Husband is going to have a bovine when the AMEX bill rolls in next month...I think I need a 12 step program.

Hello. My name is Shannon. I am an E-Bay addict.

(HELLO SHANNON!)

Nine Words You Don't Want To Hear

Monday July 10: 9 words that you don't want to hear during your physical exam:

"You have a fusiform lump in your right breast".

Well, I heard those nine words today. My doctor assured me that I shouldn't worry, and that it was probably just a cyst or backed up milk duct, and that he would send me for an ultrasound just to make sure. He came back and the appointment was for the next day. I have decided not to worry until I have something to worry about.

Tuesday July 11: Ultrasound

A painless procedure; it took about 20 minutes. Then the technician said, and I quote, "Hmm. I'm just going to have our doctor look these pictures over." Then she left me to ponder the potential frightening future...then she came back with the doctor, who said that he didn't think there was anything to be concerned about. "Get dressed. You'll have the results in about 2 days."

So, I'm calmer now, but will not breathe easy until my own doctor calls with the all-clear.

Friday, July 14: Calling the Dr

Busy all morning. Now have to wait till Monday.

Monday July 17:

Got through. Breathing easy now. Just normal dense tissue. Whew! Now I can enjoy this lovely day until the next crisis strikes...

Niagara Falls Aviary-Not For The Birds!

Mark & I took the boys to the Aviary in Niagara Falls yesterday. The birds there were absolutely beautiful, and we all had a great time watching them, and as you can see, we got some wonderful photos as well. Unfortunately, our timing was off, and we couldn't participate in the feeding of the lorakeets, but the kiddies enjoyed watching all their feathered friends perching around them. If you get a chance to get to the Falls, it's a great place to visit with kids, along with the Butterfly Conservatory. We are hoping to head there again soon, as we haven't been there for about 2 years.

Ty is finally back to normal, and is eating and drinking well. Keegan is back to normal spirits too. It took them each a full week to recover. Nasty virus, that! Knock on wood that we are through in the house now. Phoenix, Mark and I seemed to have avoided it. I am giving credit to vitamins, and in my case at least, major mind-over-matter philospohy. After all, there is the die-hard rule: "Moms aren't allowed to get sick."

With that in mind, going for my annual physical today. Keep your legs crossed for me;).

No End In Sight or The Worst Smell

Day 6 of flu-hell. Ty still barfing. Made the mistake of giving him milk, since he hadn't thrown up in 8 hours. Yeah. Came back in the form of rotten cottage cheese. I don't care what anyone says, milk-barf is THE worst smell on earth. Kripes! So he hurls this morning. I hose him off and change him. Put him in his highchair. Yarfs all over that. Put him in the bathtub. Wash him down. Put him in the crib while I bathe the other boys (3 birds with one stone...). Come back to find him covered in milk-vomit again, so I have to not only re-bathe him, but strip the bedding for the second time in 1/2 hour. Damn. And it's only 8:11 am.

(INSERT MENTAL IMAGE OF ME BAWLING MY EYES OUT HERE)

PS. Evening update: 9:39 pm

Here is my new answering machine message:

"Hello, and thank you for calling the House of Vomit. I'm sorry I can't take your call right now. I am either hosing vomit from a child, or wiping diarrhea from his ass. But you did call at a very opportune time! Now on special, with every flu-ridden child, you get 19 free loads of laundry a day, with pre-treatment for all bodily-fluid stains! And if you buy this special package today, we also provide 4 times a day bathing, and deep carpet and furniture steam cleaning. Thanks for calling, and have a great day....(this message funded in part by Spray 'n' Wash Dual Power, and Gravol)."

Welcome To My Nightmare!

Or maybe I should title this post, Welcome To The House Of Vomit. Yeah. Gross. Finally get Keegan to stop puking and then Ty starts. 32 hours later, and the poor little punkin is still throwing up anything I try to give him, and a fever with it. Breaks my heart. Worse is the "I've been violated!" look on his face when I have to give him the Tylenol or Gravol suppositories, because he returns anything given orally. It's so sad. He just wants to lie in my arms all day, which normally I wouldn't mind at all, but when I also have a 4 and 6 year old to take care of, and hourly washing to do, it's not always feasable. (sp?)

Anyway, going to try fluids again, and see what happens. Wish us luck and good health, and that Phoenix doesn't get it too (or me!)

Happy Canada Day!/OK Blue Jays!

On Canada Day, my friend Leanne invited Phoenix, Keegan and I to the Jays game in Toronto. It ended up just being me and Phoenix, as Keegan came down with the flu on Friday night, and he spent Canada Day puking out of both ends :(

Phoenix was very excited about riding on the train into the city, and from the time we got on the bus (2:02 pm) until we exited the train (3:07 pm) he asked 47 questions! Inquisitive boy! When we got the the Skydome, oops, I mean Rogers Centre or whatever the heck it is that they call it these days, Phoenix got to ride on a giant inflatable slide, high 5 a guy on stilts, and pose with a stand-up of the BJ Birdie. Then he declared that he must have a snack before he fainted, so we hustled indoors and rounded up a bag of popcorn. He plowed through that. Then announced he was ready for a hot dog. Then urgently required ice cream! Gee whiz! I don't think he really cared about the baseball game itself. He was more interested in looking around, and waving his foam Canadian Flag that they gave him at the door. The promise of fireworks at the end of the game was enough to convince him to live through all 9 innings. Thank God there was the distraction of the dome roof closing to keep him occupied for about 20 minutes.

The Jays won (yay!) and the fireworks were great. Unfortunately, because we stayed to watch them, we missed our train by one minute (CRAP!!!) and had to wait an hour for the next one. So, I got a coffee and Phoenix got the biggest rice krispie square known to man, and we waited it out until the train arrived at 8:43 pm. We didn't walk through our front door until 10:00 pm, and poor Bunny was wiped! For the first time in recorded history, Phoenix slept in this morning, until 9:00! I couldn't believe it. I also couldn't enjoy it, since Keegan and Ty were up at 6:00.

Keegan was still feeling like crap today. He's barely eaten since dinner on Friday night. I hope he's better tomorrow. It is so unlike him to be so listless. Poor Keegers. Because Ty decided to voice his objection regarding my 9 hour absence yesterday, I was up with him for way too freaking long last night. As a result, when he took his morning nap at 10:00 this morning, so did I. We both crashed until 1:00. Sweet. I could have slept all day, I swear.

Well, I think I'm going to try to catch some zzzzzzzzzz's while I have the chance. Talk soon!

PS. Pictures are:#1: Phoenix on the train, #2: Phoenix with BJ Birdie, #3: Phoenix with Leanne and his bag o' popcorn, and #4 is Phoenix and I with our flags...