Thursday, July 06, 2006

No End In Sight or The Worst Smell

Day 6 of flu-hell. Ty still barfing. Made the mistake of giving him milk, since he hadn't thrown up in 8 hours. Yeah. Came back in the form of rotten cottage cheese. I don't care what anyone says, milk-barf is THE worst smell on earth. Kripes! So he hurls this morning. I hose him off and change him. Put him in his highchair. Yarfs all over that. Put him in the bathtub. Wash him down. Put him in the crib while I bathe the other boys (3 birds with one stone...). Come back to find him covered in milk-vomit again, so I have to not only re-bathe him, but strip the bedding for the second time in 1/2 hour. Damn. And it's only 8:11 am.

(INSERT MENTAL IMAGE OF ME BAWLING MY EYES OUT HERE)

PS. Evening update: 9:39 pm

Here is my new answering machine message:

"Hello, and thank you for calling the House of Vomit. I'm sorry I can't take your call right now. I am either hosing vomit from a child, or wiping diarrhea from his ass. But you did call at a very opportune time! Now on special, with every flu-ridden child, you get 19 free loads of laundry a day, with pre-treatment for all bodily-fluid stains! And if you buy this special package today, we also provide 4 times a day bathing, and deep carpet and furniture steam cleaning. Thanks for calling, and have a great day....(this message funded in part by Spray 'n' Wash Dual Power, and Gravol)."

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